Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition
by Danaxiel
Summary: I got bored and decided to write a warriors humor fanfic. It is quite stupid. Please review and comment. Rated K for violence and stuff.
1. Welcome to the show!

**Frozenfang: **Hello there, I'm your announcer Frozenfang. And welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition. This is my** first **humor fanfic so cut me some slack.

**Staticpelt: **INTRODUCE US!

**Frozenfang: **Oh yeah. I'm here today with my announcer Icestorm and my items managerStaticpelt!

**Icestorm: **Sup

**Staticpelt: **GOT ANY BEEF JERKY?

**Frozenfang: **Anyway our first contestant today is… Brambleclaw!

**Brambleclaw: **Wha- where am I?!

**Staticpelt: **IN A BATTLE ARENA WHERE YOU WILL FIGHT TO THE DEATH WITH AN OPPONENT WHO IS OBVIOUSLY MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU!

**Icestorm: **In 5…4…3…

**Brambleclaw: **Wait a second! How do I win!

**Frozenfang: **By kicking your opponent's butts!

**Icestorm: **2…1…Fiiiiiiiiiiiiight!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**Staticpelt: **SEND IN PIKACHU!

**Brambleclaw: **( laughs ) Hhahahahaha! He's a frickin mouse!

**Staticpelt: **WITH ELETRICALLY CHARGED CHEEKS!

**Brambleclaw: **I can take him. (Lunges forward)

**Pikachu: **Pika pika! (Launches a lightning bolt at Brambleclaw)

**Brambleclaw: **What the StarClan!? (Gets fried)

**Staticpelt: **HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! SHOCKING ISN'T IT BRAMBLEBUTT!?

**Icestorm: **Sorry Brambleclaw. You lose! Hhahahahaha! Err- I mean better luck next time.

**Brambleclaw: **(Fur smoking) what happens now

**Frozenfang: **Well…normally we would send you back but Staticpelt didn't get to blow anything up this round.

**Staticpelt: **EXPLOSIONS! EXPLOSIONS! (Eyes turn red) EXPLOSIONS! NOW!

**Frozenfang: **Go ahead. Brambleclaw doesn't mind.

**Brambleclaw: **Yes I do!

**Frozenfang: **Oh well. No plan is perfect.

**Icestorm: **Blow him up already!

**Staticpelt: **YAY! (Pulls the rocket trigger)

**Brambleclaw: #$%#%%^T^5^!?!?**

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

**Icestorm: **Bad kitty. You know we have a no cussing policy!

**Frozenfang:** Thanks for joining us. Bye! (Brambleclaw disappears magically).

**Frozenfang: well thanks for reading please review and comment how I did. **

**Icestorm: Also tell him your ideas about who should suffer, I mean play next.**

**Staticpelt: WINDS OF CHANGE AND ROUGES REVENGE WILL BE UPDATED SOON!**

**Frozenfang: Once again, thanks for reading my first Humor fanfic! Bye.**


	2. Tag Teams!

**Frozenfang: **Hello there everyone!

**Staticpelt: **HI HI HI HI PEOPLES!

**Icestorm: **What is up my homie peeps?

**Frozenfang: **Welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warrior Edition!

**Staticpelt: **YAY! WOOPIE! HORRAY! BEEF JERKY!

**Frozenfang: **Responding to **Rayne** and **Ashstar, **our contestants today will be in a tag team! Please welcome Firestar and Tigerstar!

(Firestar and Tigerstar magically appear.)

**Firestar: **Uh-oh. This evil place is why Brambleclaw is on fire!!!

**Tigerstar: **Muwahahahahaha! I have risen from the dead and can torment innocent lives once more!

**Icestorm:** Sorry to disappoint you but have to go back to being dead after this is over.

**Firestar: **Haha.

**Bramblebreath: ** Hi.

**Frozenfang: **You can't be in here! Go away little brother.

**Bramblebreath: **I don't think I will.

**Frozenfang: **Fine…

**Staticpelt: **SEND IN KIRBY AND SNAKE!!!

**Tigerstar: **What's a Kirby?

**Icestorm: **5…4…3…2…1…FIGHT!

(Snake chucks a grenade at Firestar.)

**Firestar: **Hey that's a funny looking apple.

BOOOOOOOOM!

**Staticpelt: **HAHA! KITTY GO BOOM. ATTENTION FIGHTERS! I AM RELEASHING A SMASH BALL!

(Kirby gets the smash ball and pulls out a giant cooking pot)

**Tigerstar: **What's he cooking?

**Icestorm: **You. Haha.

**Tigerstar: **AHHHHHHHHH! (Gets sucked into pot.)

**Frozenfang: **That's wraps things up. Make sure too review, comment, and tell us who should play (suffer) next.

**Bramblebreath: **Bye bye.

**Frozenfang: **Get the StarClan out of here!

**Bramblebreath: **Make sure to review!


	3. Staticpelt's giant robot!

**Frozenfang: **Hello there tom and she-cats of all clans! It's time for-

**Bramblebreath: **Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition! Yay!

**Staticpelt: **SEND IN JAYFEATHER!!!

**Frozenfang: **All right, all right. Our first contestant, responding to **Nianque****'s **request**, **is Jayfeather!!!

**Staticpelt: ** YAY!! GO BLINDY!!

**Jayfeather: **…and if you eat this herb you will-… Brightheart? Where am I?!?!

**Icestorm: **To give Jayfeather…

**Staticpelt: **YOU MEAN BLINDY!!!

**Jayfeather: **Hey!!

**Icestorm: **…a fair advantage, he will be facing Jigglypuff!!

**Jigglypuff:** ……. (Snore)…….

**Bramblebreath: **Hhahahahaha!! He's asleep!! (Laughs manically.) Hhahahahaha! What a loser!!

**Icestorm: **5…4…

**Staticpelt: **3333333333333!!!!!!!!!

**Icestorm: **2…1…

**Bramblebreath: **GO!!!!

**Jayfeather: **Rarrr!!! (Runs off the ledge and dies)

**Staticpelt: **BOR-ING!!! BRING IN ASHFUR!!!

**Frozenfang: **Well that was anticlimactic. Anyway, responding to Moonstream, next up is Ashfur vs. Ganondorf!!!!

**Icestorm: **Because nobody likes Ashfur!

**Ashfur: **Not true! My mom thinks I'm awesome!

**Ganondorf: **Loser…

**Icestorm: **5…4…3…2…1…FIGHT!!!

**Staticpelt: **CAN I USE MY GIANT ROBOT!!!

**Frozenfang: **As long as it a chainsaw! I really want to see Ashfur get massacred!!

**Ashfur: **Hey!!

(Staticpelt's giant robot walks onto stage!)

**Ashfur: **Great mother of mustard! What is that thing!?!?

**Icestorm:** Great mother of mustard? What the StarClan does that mean!

(Ashfur is getting ripped apart by a chainsaw in the backround…)

**Bramblebreath: **Hey guys, I think he's dead…

(Giant robot burning Ashfur's corpse with a flamethrower…)

**Frozenfang: (**Says cheerfully.)All right Ashfur how ya feeling?

**Ashfur: **Momma? Is that you?

**Staticpelt: **DON'T GO TOWARDS THE LIGHT!!!!!

**Frozenfang: **Bye Ashfur!

(Ashfur magically disappears.)

**Frozenfang: Don't forget to comment on all my stories! Make sure to comment on which warrior should Participate**/**Die next!!**

**Hope you guys had fun reading! I'm gonna keep updated Rouges Revenge and Winds of Change. Bye!!!-**

_**Frozenfang**_


	4. Getting Your Butt Whooped by a Plant!

**Frozenfang: **Hello and welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition! Here with me today are my buddies Icestorm and Staticpelt!

**Staticpelt: **HEY! HEY! Hey!

**Icestorm: **I'm single for all you she-cats.

**Frozenfang: **First up today, responding to **Icethroat**, a tag team combo, please welcome, brother and sister, fire and water, Lionblaze and Hollyleaf!!

**Staticpelt: **AGAINST THEM WILL BE, NESS AND IVYSAUR!!

(Lionblaze and Hollyleaf poof into the arena.)

**Hollyleaf: **NO!!! I killed myself for a reason!

**Lionblaze: **So we have to fight a twoleg kit and a plant? This is gonna be easy!!

**Icestorm: **5…4…3…2…1…FIGHT!!

**Staticpelt: **LET IT RAIN BOMB-OHMS!

(Ness takes out a baseball bat and hits the bomb-ohms right towards Lionblaze.)

**Hollyleaf: **Lionblaze, duck! Duck!

**Lionblaze: **Goose!

( Bombs hit Lionblaze and he goes flying off the stage.)

**Lionblaze: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!**

**Hollyleaf: **Useless lump of crowfood…

(Ivysaur uses Razor Leaf on Hollyleaf, cuts her in half, and blood goes everywhere

**Frozenfang: **(says cheerfully.) Before this gets any more graphic, see ya guys.

**Hollyleaf & Lionblaze: **Uhhh…….

**Staticpelt: **I'LL GET THEM SOME MEDICAL HELP!!

**Icestorm: **I'm still single.

**Frozenfang: **Bye everyone! Make sure to comment and tell us who should participate/die next! I'll update Rouge Revenge soon! Bye!


	5. The Green Chapter

**Frozenfang: **Hello. Today we will focus on going green and saving our planet.

**Staticpelt: **DON'T LITTER! RECYCLE! TURN OFF THE WATER WHEN YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH!!

**Frozenfang: **There you have it. Welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition! I'm here with my two buddies Staticpelt and Icestorm!!!!

**Icestorm: **Hello ladies. I'm single.

**Staticpelt: **HI HI HI HI!!

**Frozenfang: **Today, responding to **Amberleaf, **our contestant today is…. Hawkfrost!!

(Hawkfrost appears out of nowhere.)

**Staticpelt: **BOOOOO!!!!!

**Hawkfrost: **One minute I'm tormenting Lionblaze in his dreams, and now I'm here! How?

**Frozenfang: **His opponent will be…

**Staticpelt: **BOWSER! BOWSER!

**Frozenfang: **All right then!

(Bowser poofs into the arena.)

**Icestorm: **5…4…3…2…1… GO!!

**Staticpelt: **ASSIST TROPHY TIME!!!

**Hawkfrost: **What?

(Bowser breathes a flurry of fire and burns Hawkfrost to a crisp.)

**Hawkfrost: **Oh Great StarClan! Help me! Help me!

**StarClan cat: **Sure now you believe in us…

(Andross comes out of the assist trophy and starts shooting the glass thingys at Hawkfrost.)

**Hawkfrost: **Oof! Ahh! Help! Me! Tigerstar! Please!

**Tigerstar: **Hehe..

**Staticpelt: **YOU LOSE! HAHAHA!

**Frozenfang: **Okay, before Hawkfrost can suffer any more, here is our next contestant that **Macey the Invisible **kindly suggested! Here's Graystripe!

**Graystripe: **(Snore…) …Silverstream…Millie…hehee…stop it…

**Frozenfang: **Isn't that cute? He sleeping. (Pulls out a megaphone.) YOUR OPPONENT WILL BE CHARZARD!!!!!!!!!!!

**Graystripe: **Ahhh! Who! What!

BOOOOM!!

(A tank busts through the wall and Bramblebreath's head pops out of it.)

**Bramblebreath: **Hiya!

**(**Charzard picks up a boulder and whacks Graystripe over the head with it.)

**Frozenfang: **Bramblebreath! You little brat! You went in my room without asking!

(Graystripe is getting flamethrowered in the backround.)

**Icestorm: **Lets go out for pizza.

**Bramblebreath: **Yay!

**Staticpelt: **GUYS! WE FORGOT ABOUT GRAYSTRIPE!

(Charzard is pulling out Graystripe's organs.)

**Frozenfang: (**Says happily.) Thanks for playing Graystripe!

**Graystripe: **I…hate…you…

(He poofs away.)

**Frozenfang: **That wraps things up! Make sure to comment on who play and or die next!

**Staticpelt: **BYE BYE!


	6. Staticpelt gets out of Hand

**Frozenfang: **What is up? I'm Frozenfang and welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition!

**Staticpelt: **YAY!

**Frozenfang: **I'll be filling in for Icestorm today. He's busy crying in his room.

**Staticpelt: **HE GOT DUMPED!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!

**Frozenfang: **Anyway… today, responding to **Galadriadhar****, **today we have everyone's favorite weirdo. Here's Sol!!!

(Sol poofs into the arena.)

**Sol: **Hello.

**Staticpelt: **YOU DON'T LOOK VERY SURPRISED TO BE HERE!!

**Sol: **I'm not.

**Frozenfang: **Freak… Oh well. He will be facing….Mr. Game and Watch!

**Mr. Game and Watch: **Beep.

**Sol: **I knew you would pit me against the illogical choice of 2-dimensional, black-and-white twoleg in a battle of wits.

**Frozenfang: **Not exactly. This isn't a battle of wits.

**Sol: **But…but…I'm never wrong!

(Sol evaporates into dust.)

**Frozenfang:** That was…odd. Since Sol has been disintegrated we will have a different contestant. Thank you **Songdust** for kindly suggesting that we let Daisy play!!!

**Daisy: **Uh…where am I?

**Frozenfang: ** 3…2…1…FIGHT!!

**Staticpelt: **SEND IN THE NEUTER SCOOTER!!!!

**Frozenfang: **Neuter scooter?

(A giant robotic scooter rolls into the arena, picks up Daisy, and pulls out a pair of giant scissors.)

**Frozenfang: **This is going to scar me for life…(pukes.)

**Staticpelt: **THIS IS SO GOING ON YOUTUBE!!!!!!

**Frozenfang: **Goodbye Da- (pukes.) Daisy.

**Daisy:** I…feel…so…violated.

(Everyone poofs out of the arena.)

**Frozenfang: **Okay… this is going to provoke some angry reviews. This will also come out of your salary Staticpelt.

**Staticpelt: **BYE FROZENFANG!!!

**Frozenfang: **Wait you can't do tha-

(Frozenfang poofs away. Mistyfoot poofs in the arena.)

**Staticpelt: **GET HER SQUIRTLE!!

(A jet of water shoots out of Squirtle's mouth and knocks Mistyfoot off the stage.)

(Frozenfang poofs back into the arena with a bazooka.)

**Frozenfang: **Do that again and you'll regret it Staticpelt. Pleas review and tell us who should die and or play next!!! Bye!

**Staticpelt: **BYE BYE!!!


	7. I join the Brawl!

**Frozenfang: **Welcome to Super Smash Bros: Warriors Edition!!!! Normally, I would introduce my co-hosts Staticpelt and Icestorm, but Staticpelt is currently in prison for murder and Icestorm quit. In this case, for the first time ever I'm looking for **NEW CO-HOSTS!!! **One **Weapons Manager and one Announcer** So here's the question: **What is the best name for two red kits? Tell me your answers when you review or just private message me! **

**Frozenfang: **Now we get down to business. Responding to **Ashstar, **I will be playing against Pokemon Trainer!!!!

**(**Pokemon Trainer poofs onto the stage.)

**Computer: **_5, 4, 3, 2, 1, start._

**Pokemon trainer**: (reaches for pokeballs and find that there is none.) Huh?

**Frozenfang: **Looking for these? (Holds up pokeballs and throws them over the ledge)

**Frozenfang: **Die twoleg!

(Pokemon trainer catches me in a pokeball)

**Frozenfang: **SO NOT COOL!!!! SICK HIM BOY!!!

(Giant hellhound leaps on stage and eats pokemon trainer.)

**Frozenfang: **Thanks boy. Well while I try to get out of this thing, Responding to **Spottedmask, **here's Ravenpaw. (Cell phone rings.)

(Ravenpaw poofs into the arena.)

**Frozenfang: **What do you mean no more contestants?!?! …All right bye. Well, since we don't have any more enemies, Ravenpaw can face the hellhound.

**Ravenpaw: **Huh?

(Hellhound starts tearing Ravenpaw apart.)

**Frozenfang: **Isn't that cute. They're playing tag!

**Ravenpaw**: AHHHH!!!

**Frozenfang: **Bye Ravenpaw! Hope you had a great time!! You can keep the hellhound.

(Ravenpaw and the hellhound poof away.)

**Frozenfang: **Aww were out of time. Oh well. Be sure to tell me your best kit names if you want to be my **NEW CO-HOSTS!!!!** Also tell me who should suffer next.

**Bye! -**_**Frozenfang**_


	8. Grand ReOpening!

Welcome to the Grand Re-Premier of Super Smash Bros. Warriors Edition!!!!!

With your host…..**Danaxiel!!!!**

**Danaxiel:** What's up everyone? I'm your new host Danaxiel!! I'm sure you all remember Frozenfang, the previous host. Well, I promise to be an even better host than him! First things first, don't tell me to be nice to your favorite cats. I don't do nice. Just tell me to not kill them. I'm understanding of that. Please welcome my temporary co-hosts! The first one is Staticpelt's demonic little brother. Please welcome….Darkit!!!

**Darkit: **Greetings mortals.

**Danaxiel: **Now put your hands together for Bramblebreath!!

**Bramblebreath: **Hi mom!

**Danaxiel: **And last but not least… here's Bob the camera man/cat.

**Bob: **I would like to say…

**Darkit: **Cameramen don't get to speak.

**Bramblebreath: **He's a camera cat.

**Bob: **Do camera cats get to speak?

**(Everyone): **Shut up Bob!

**Danaxiel:** Ignoring those random comments… Today we will be responding to **Faedra's **response. So, please welcome everyone's favorite nobody, Crowfeather!!

(Crowfeather magically appears in the arena.)

**Crowfeather: **Huh? Where am I?!

**Darkit: **On your deathbed, mortal.

**Bramblebreath: **Stop calling everyone mortals, it's just plain creepy!

**Darkit: **What would you like me to call you? How bought normalcy? Would you like to be called a Bland-O?  
**Bramblebreath: **…..

**Crowfeather: **Will somebody tell me what I'm doing here?!?!

**Bramblebreath: **No.

**Darkit: **Dying.

**Bob: **Well…

**Danaxiel: **Talking gets your salary cut in half Bob.

**Crowfeather: **HHHHEEEEEEYYYYYYYYY!!!!

(Everyone shuts up)

**Crowfeather: **Just tell me what I'm doing here.

**Darkit: **You are here as a participant for a game that involves fighting the most popular video game characters.

**Crowfeather: **Video game?

**Darkit: **You are so freaking hopeless.

**Danaxiel: **Al righty then! Today Crowfeather will be facing off against a swordsman.

**Crowfeather: **Who's he talking to?

**Darkit: **For your feeble understanding, he's talking to a magical picture box.

**Bramblebreath: **Oh, I get it now!

**Darkit: **Again, so freaking hopeless.

**Danaxiel: ** Ignoring the random comments AGAIN. Crowfeather will go against Ike!

(The blue haired swordsman teleports in the arena)

**Crowfeather: **I have to go against him?

**Bramblebreath: **Uh-huh!

**Crowfeather: **Do I get an awesome twoleg weapon?

**Bramblebreath: **You can use my slingshot!

**Darkit: **Quiet mortal! It's Danaxiel's turn to talk.

**Danaxiel: **We are adding a new twist to the game. Warriors can choose a power-up to help them gain an advantage.

**Crowfeather: **Any power-up I want?

**Darkit: **Precisely.

**Bramblebreath: **Simple and clean is the way you're making me feel tonight!

**Darkit: **The brat has been playing too much Kingdom Hearts.

**Bramblebreath: **…It's hard to let it go!

(Darkit whacks Bramblebreath over the head)

**Bramblebreath: **My sanctuary….

(Darkit whacks Bramblebreath harder)

**Darkit: **That should keep his interruptions limited.

**Crowfeather: **What about me!

**Danaxiel: **Oh yeah! I forgot about you. FIGHT TO THE DEATH!!!!

**Crowfeather: ** Oh just kill me already.

(Ike gladly accepts the offer and drop kicks Crowfeather.)

**Danaxiel: **3…2…1…

**It's time for the commercial break!**

**Random conversation between Darkit, Danaxiel, and Bramblebreath**

*******

Bramblebreath (normal font) _**Darkit (Italics and bold)**_**Danaxiel****(Regular Bold)**

***

Do you know the Muffin Man?

**The Muffin Man?**

The Muffin Man!! Do you know the Muffin Man?

**Who lives on Drury Lane?**

_**What are you two talking about?**_

**The Muffin Man!**

The Muffin Man!

_**You are talking about the Muffin Man?**_

**Who lives on Drury Lane!**

Yup, we're talking about the Muffin Man.

**The Muffin Man?**

The Muffin Man!

_**Stop it now before you two wake up underwater.**_

(Snickers) I don't think Darkit likes the Muffin Man.

_**(Hits Bramblebreath with a frying pan)**_

**I'll stop now.**

_**Good idea.**_

….Muffler man…who peed on Brewer Dane….

**Now we return to the fanfic.**

**Danaxiel: ** 3…2…1… GAME!!!!

**Crowfeather: ** …Ugh… Did I win?

**Darkit: **Judging by your face, you lost.

**Crowfeather: **Is my face that ugly?

**Danaxiel: **Bye Crowfeather!

(Crowfeather disappears)

**Bramblebreath: **Move along, move along just to make it through.

**Darkit: **Before he breaks off into another singing spree, we should end this.

**Danaxiel: **Sadly, Darkit is right. So, make sure to review and tell us who should play next. We accept OC's. Plus, remember the contest. **IF YOU CAN TELL ME THE BEST NAMES FOR TWO RED KITS, YOU CAN BE THE NEW CO-HOSTS. WE CHOOSE FIVE AUTHORS WITH THE BEST NAMES TO BE THE NEW CO-HOSTS. ONLY FIVE THOUGH! WE WILL CHOOSE AT THE END OF CHAPTER 10!!!**

**See you next time!**


End file.
